Yesterday, while driving back home, I had the realization that I should love all the things I usually don't love about myself.

For example, I've always envied those who can keep a crowd's attention and awe with just their voice. I'm unable to do this. Sometimes I can be very outgoing, but most of the time I do suffer from social anxiety which keeps me back from exploding as my real self. However, this has also given me the space to observe more deeply how people feel and what they do. I think that because of this I've developed a pretty good ability at judging emotions and motivations. I guess I envy extroverts because it's something I feel is desirable (maybe a cultural influence), but the truth is that I really do love this part of myself. I should embody it more, bring it in more, and even leverage the alternative forces it provides rather than trying to become something that has never really felt natural. Be grateful rather than ashamed.

There's also my fear and aversion of medical things and my tendency towards hypochondria. I've battled with these most of my life and would definitely be happy to see them gone. However, my struggle to find a way to cope with the opposing pressures—which at times felt were causing me to feel I was literally going insane—has also pushed me to find ways to grow as a person, to reflect and meditate. Looking back, I would never have gotten to where I am today without these internal forces, and because of that I love them. Though I would still like to grow past them ☺️

I'm sure there're other things. Lately I've been thinking about whether it would be better for me to write in my main language rather than in English. But the truth is that writing in my native language feels very strange, especially because I almost don't read any literature written in it so my vocabulary is lacking. I'm still learning to love this, but it has indeed forced me to pay closer attention to language in general and to the art of crafting written pieces. Sometimes this thought inhibits me, but some other wonderful times, it sets me free(-er) from the bounds of social norm and cultural conventions.

Love what you think are your weaknesses—they are really your life's main strengths in disguise. They are the forces that push you to become you.